Are you newly married? Arguing? Don’t be sad.. This is a good sign:
Sometimes couples have to argue, not to prove who’s right or wrong, but to be reminded that their love is worth fighting for.
There are many different types of arguing relationships, we shall explore the two I have identified and how to overcome them. The two which always stick out are:
- Sheep and wolf
- Lion and Tiger
Are you in a sheep and wolf relationship or a Lion and Tiger?
Sheep and wolf
You’re wondering, scratching your head in a total shock what nonsense! Well a sheep and wolf relationship is as follows:
- Backs down when in an argument
- Keeps quiet when addressed
- Bites tongue at other partners shortfalls / unacceptable behaviour
- Will agree to anything and everything that partner says
- Always like to shout way over sheep
- Brings emotional drama, blackmail and belittles partner
- Likes to be the one who wins the arguments
- Gets way in ideas, desires, wants and doesn’t think of partner as an equal
You could either be the sheep or the wolf… this is not a healthy situation to be in as the couples who never seem to argue (outsiders think are perfect) or address their disagreements are what we call a “Wolf and Sheep couple”. The sheep doesn’t have enough backbone or spirit to stand up for what they want so they just sheepishly give in to what the other wants. The wolf sits pretty for a while, until he or she wants more from a relationship than a sheep across the table! You see, a sheep is as bad for it as the wolf is for the sheep.
What to do in this situation?
You need to do the following three acts:
- The wolf needs to listen to the needs of the sheep and to put themselves in their shoes.
- The sheep needs to be brave and voice their opinion, they have to structure their arguments for the wolf to understand that they are an equal part in the relationship.
- The both need to rethink why they are together.
Love, respect and teamwork are when a relationship flourishes. If you are lacking in these three areas then you have to identify the walls and help each other take it down, brick by brick.
Next blog post Lion and Tiger :)